PEOPLE AND COMMUNITY
In conversation with
Natali Stajcic 1. You have created and sustain a online community for self discovery called On Balance what led you to its creation?
I think that often we build the things that we wish we had. I struggled with my sense of self, inner confidence and mood for most of my young adult life. These struggles were compounded when two events happened in quick succession. My youngest brother died, and I had my first child. There were several other challenges, too, and I began to experience daily panic attacks, extreme mood swings and tremendous anxiety. This inability to cope with everyday life pushed me onto the path that eventually created on balance. Over the ten years that I struggled, I tried many different healing modalities, read many helpful books and had a good rational understanding of what was happening with me. However, it wasn’t until I sat down with spiritual counsellor Nicky Clinch that everything shifted. She showed me the compassion I desperately needed and pushed me to explore the 12-step program Al-Anon. The purpose of this group is to help people who have grown up around or lived with someone who is an alcoholic. It took me till the age of 27 to recognise that my father is an alcoholic, and then I began to notice that other family members also suffered from addiction. My life changed forever with the first meeting I attended in Soho. In those rooms, I heard words shared that could have been from my mouth, and I felt seen, heard and understood. I developed my relationship with a higher power and created my life philosophy here.
2. What ambitions, dreams and desires do you have for its growth?
I love business strategy and all that comes with building something, but I am fluid regarding a long-term plan and allow the business to unfold organically. I would love to see my membership, SEASON grow in numbers; the community aspect of this program is beautiful, and to see that growth would be magical. I want to create a podcast, and I definitely have a few more books in me. I am in no rush, and patience, consistency and resilience are held close as a small business owner. Regarding my development and growth, I would like to train in Kundalini yoga as I find it fascinating, and I want to do a degree in philosophy one day.
3. What inspired you to pursue the particular avenue for coaching that you practice, which focuses on self discovery and veers away from the issuing of advice or sharing of your personal knowledge. You really create a space for people to develop self understanding. This in modern times is a very novel way of approaching working with people, what inspired you to use this approach and how do you feel it's helpful?
My coaching style evolves as I evolve, but it will always be question led. I believe we hold the answers within, and it is my job to help you find yourself amongst the noise. It is so easy to lose ourselves in this modern world, and I want my clients to find themselves rather than me adding more noise. So I stay curious and open. That said, in my group coaching program SEASON, I have the opportunity to teach subjects that excite me, which I am enjoying; there is also a considerable portion of self-discovery practices within the membership, but teaching the self-mastery tools that I believe in feels like a perfect balance. We must try things to work out what we like, so I hope to provide the space and inspiration for this exploration.
4. We tend to think of ourselves in terms of fixed linear identities and roles but we all occupy multiple evolving and simultaneous ones. How do you integrate the various roles and identities you have and what are these?
I have never felt a fixed or linear identity, and I haven't followed traditional paths in life. My father is Serbian, and I think the Serbian way of questioning why we do what we do has influenced me. I've always felt very open to my many versions and identities, like a deep sense of knowing that I am here to change. One of my favourite quotes is, "There is nothing as stable as change". I have many roles, but I don't look at them as separate, and one of the reasons that I chose this career is that the idea of living with parts of me in boxes didn't appeal to me. My work, marriage, family, social life, joy and pain are one.
5. What resources, practices and approaches do you use to support yourself and you in your various roles.
The practices and approaches I use now have taken years of experimentation to get them to where they are, and the level to which I look after myself is because my mental health needs a lot of support, and my career is to hold space for others. I meditate daily, a mixture of breath work and kundalini meditations for about half an hour; I follow this with pilates. I express gratitude either in writing, out loud or in my head. These are non-negotiable and happen at least six times a week. Before bed, I always stretch, put my legs up against the wall, and gua sha, which I find so relaxing! I enjoy watching the sky go dark while sitting in bed with no lights on. Sleep is so important to me; I am not good with little sleep, so making sure I'm in bed at approximately the same time each night helps me. If I look after myself, it supports all my roles. If someone asked me where to begin with supportive practices, I would always say to get the basics right - drinking enough water, getting good sleep, nourishing food and belly breathing.
6. What does wellbeing mean for you?
Well-being for me is holding an awareness of how I'm feeling, what energy I'm putting out into the world and being mindful. It is an ever-evolving supportive framework. There are moments in my life when focusing on my well-being is a priority and others when I can hold it lightly. It is never restrictive or punitive. It is always fluid and compassionate. I wish for simple and accessible well-being practices to be within reach for everyone. Well-being isn't powders, superfoods and expensive crystals. It begins with your breath and connecting to your spirit and doesn't need to be complicated.
7. Do you have any principles or philosophies that you use to guide you personally or professionally in your decision making and actions.
I have been interested in human design for several years and have incorporated some design principles into my life. I'm a 2/4 splenic projector, so I use my intuition in decision-making. I have never been someone to overthink something and tend to make quick decisions. At times this has meant that I've had some steep learning curves, but mostly it has felt really good to me. Learning my human design has confirmed so many things for me.
8. Where have you faced the greatest challenges in your various roles. How have you faced these?
Without a doubt - motherhood and pregnancy. My mental state during pregnancy and the first year of motherhood is incredibly volatile and vulnerable. It has meant that there has been immense pressure on my relationships in those times (I have three girls). It was the hardest with my first which led to a lot of chaos in my life, and then still hard with my second and slightly more manageable with my third. And then motherhood itself is both profoundly joyful and, at the same time, incredibly confronting. I naturally like alone time and a calm environment which, as a mother to three, doesn't come easily. My husband and I are very mindful of ensuring we each meet our needs along with the children's.
9. Where have you perceived/ felt your greatest triumphs.
My first business was an almond milk company, and whilst, unfortunately, the company folded in dramatic style, raising the investment on Crowdcube in three hours felt like a triumph. Negotiating my book deal whilst sunbathing on a beach in Valencia was another high moment, and deciding to begin On Balance is another moment to recognise. After being stung by my first business, beginning On Balance took a lot of courage.
10. Where do you find comfort and joy?
In the arms of my family. The life we have created for ourselves in Somerset fills me with so much joy; I thrive off simple family time, pottering around in each other's company.
Find Natali’s On Balance community here https://onbalance.space
Find On Balance on social media here: onbalancecommunity
30/06/2023
